You are having your sandwich wrong, Uncle Fyodor. You are having it sausage side up, and you want that sausage on your tongue. Better for the taste that way! How do you know they call me Uncle Fyodor though? I know everybody in the building. When you live up in the attic, you see things. They call me Cat Matroskin. My last name, that. The attic’s under repair now, so I’ve nowhere to live. And, Uncle Fyodor, do you have any more of those wrong sandwiches? At home, yeah. You wanna come live with me? Your mother won’t let me. She will too! I think… Dad might put in a word. If it isn’t a cat I smell here. Must be Uncle Fyodor brought one. So what if he did? We could do with a cat here. YOU could do with, and I could do WITHOUT. Just think about it. What use is there to having this cat? Must there be? What use, say, is there to having that picture on the wall? Oh, there is some use to that picture all right. It covers up the rip in the wallpaper. So? We’ll put the cat to some use as well. Like catching mice for one. – We don’t have any mice here.
– We’ll get some! Well, if this cat is such a big deal to you, choose now: him or me! Well, well, well, ahh, ahh… I choose you then. You – I’ve know you for years, this cat – I’ve only just met. My dear parents: Daddy and Mommy. I love you a lot, but I love animals too. Cats most of all!
– Right. And you won’t let me have any. Which is why I am going away to the country to stay. Your son, Uncle Fyodor. – And the cat! Hello! Let me come live with you. I’ll guard things for you and stuff. Yeah, right. We don’t even have a house to begin with. Come by in about a year, when we’ve settled in. You, Matroskin, be quiet! It never hurts to have a good dog around. We’d better go see if there’s a vacant house in the village. Yes, there is! I’ll show you this one house – nobody lives in it. The owners have moved out across the river. – Does it have a stove?
– Does it! Half the kitchen’s size! So, will you let me come live with you? Or shall I come back later, like in a year? Yeah. We will. Three is more fun. What’s your name? Sharik. I am one of your ordinary dogs. No pedigree. My name is Uncle Fyodor. The cat’s Matroskin. – My last name, that.
– Nice to meet you. Bless you! Thank you! You have any parents, boy? How did you land in this village of ours? I don’t. I’m a boy all on my own. An on-my-own one. I’ve come from the city. It doesn’t work like that. Kids being all on their own. Kids belong to their parents. What do you mean “doesn’t”? Me, I’m a cat – a cat on my own. An on-my-own one. Me, I am my own too. Why do you need to know though? You’re not with the police, are you? No, not with the police. I’m with the post office. Your local postman, Pechkin. Which makes it my job to know things. So I can deliver mail. Will you, say, be subscribing to anything? – I’ll have a comic book.
– Me, I’ll have a hunting magazine. Me, I won’t have anything. What I’ll do is save. What’s with never having any milk? We may well die at this rate. We’d better buy a cow. We’d better, but what do we do for money? Say, we borrow from the neighbours? And we pay back how? We have to, you know. We pay back with milk. If we give back the milk, why bother getting a cow? Well, then we sell something. – Like what?
– Like something useless. To sell something useless, we have to first buy something useless. Which we don’t have money for. – What do you say, we sell you Sharik?
– How do you mean? There’ll be no selling anybody. We are going on a treasure hunt. Hooray! And uhm… What do you mean “pressure”? How come I hadn’t thought of the treasure? We are buying a cow for sure now. And we’ll quit gardening too. We can do all our shopping at the market. And at the store too. The store is better for meat. – Why is that?
– More bones. – Hooray!
– Pressure! Give it back! Give it back! Back, I tell you! Gotcha! That jackdaw stole my olympic rouble. It belongs in a clinic, to have tests run on it. It belongs in no clinic. We’ll doctor it and teach how to talk. And what do you have in that chest there? We’ve been picking us some mushrooms, get it? I sure do. What’s not to get? They might as well have taken a suitcase. It’s your fault. Your indulging him in everything is what spoiled him. It’s just that he likes animals. No wonder he’s left with the cat. Kids need to have dogs around, and cats, and a bunch of other kids To play hide and seek and all that… Kids won’t go missing then. Then it’s their parents who will, because me, I get enough stress at work as it is. I barely have enough strength left to watch TV! And stop it with all this nonsense anyway! Better tell me how we go about finding our boy. We should put out a missing boy ad, like in a paper. The name’s Uncle Fyodor, one twenty tall. Please report, if anyone sees him. Why just waste food on him? Let’s put him to some use. Say “Who’s there”? “Who’s there?”. Why don’t you? “Who’s there?” “Who’s there?” “Who’s there? Don’t you have better things to do? You’d better be teaching him songs or poems. I can sing my own songs, but what’s the point. Any point to these “whostheres” of yours? – There is too!
– Like what? – Imagine we are out and a stranger comes by…
– And? Gets knocking at the door. So the jackdaw goes ‘Who’s a-there?’ The stranger figures there’s someone in, and doesn’t bother breaking in. You get it? – Who’s there? Who’s there?
– Hooray, it works! Who’s there?
– It’s me, postman Pechkin. Here’s a “missing” ad about your boy. – Who’s there?
– No one’s there!
– It’s me, postman Pechkin. Here’s a “missing” ad about your boy. Who’s there? Who’s there? Who’s there? Who’s there? Who’s there? Who’s there? Who’s there? It’s me, postman Pechkin. Here’s a “missing” ad about your boy. Boy missing! Blue eyes, one twenty tall. His parents want him back. Finder will be rewarded with a bike. Don’t fret, Mr. Fyodor. You can’t be the only such boy around. Maybe not. But you don’t get a bike for finding any other. I’ll be taking your boy’s measurements now. My dear Mom and Dad, I am doing fine. I really am! I want for nothing… Ah! My dear Mom and Dad, I am doing fine. I really am! I want for nothing, have my own place. It’s warm too. It has a room and a kitchen. I miss you all badly, especially evenings. My health isn’t so great, though: I get aches in my paws and my tail is going. And this other day I started shedding. There’s hair all over the place. You don’t want to see this. I love, though, how my new hair is all clean and silky. So, I am now shaggier by a bit. Good-bye. Your son, Uncle Sharik. – He is what by a bit?
– Shaggier. Good for sleeping in the snow, come winter. I don’t get any of it. Are we crazy or something? Maybe it’s us getting shaggier here? Us who can sleep in the snow? If we were crazy, we wouldn’t be crazy together. Going crazy is individual. Now flu – that’s a catching thing all right. Hello there! I am postman Pechkin from Prostokvashino Is this where I get a bike for finding lost boys? – It’s your fault Uncle Fyodor is sick.
– How is that my fault? How now?… YOU had him drink that cold milk! You were bragging too, like “Does my cow give the coldest milk or what? Saves us buying a fridge! – Who’s there?
– Friends! In this kind of weather friends stay in and watch TV. Only strangers prowl about. We are not opening! Open! That’s my Mom and Dad there. Look what they’ve done to your kid! They seriously belong in a clinic, to have tests run on them. – Do you have any raspberries here?
– There you go. Ah! My, I never knew cats could be so smart! I thought all they did was cry in the trees. Big deal! I do needlework and machine sewing too… Son, you have no say in this, we are taking you home. You need care. If you feel like bringing the cat too, or Sharik, or whoever – go ahead. No objections. Well, Matroskin, you wanna come along? I would if it was just me. But there’s the cow, the house, winter supplies to make… And you, Sharik? We’ll stay. You come and visit us, at school break. And over at weekends. Wait! Wait! Here, take him. He’ll be fun to have around. Who’s there? It’s me, postman Pechkin. Delivering your comic book. Oh, this is so awkward… We forgot all about Pechkin. And rightly so. He’s such a nuisance. Excuse me, I was a nuisance why? Because I didn’t have a bicycle. From now on I’ll be getting much kinder. I think I’ll get me a pet too, something to keep me happy. I get home, and it’s there, happy to see me back. Come visit us in Prostokvashino!